


Whither Thou Goest

by Emmybazy



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Future, Kid Fic, M/M, POV Alternating, Parabatai Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-25
Updated: 2017-09-25
Packaged: 2019-01-05 04:16:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12182721
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Emmybazy/pseuds/Emmybazy
Summary: A story told in alternating POVs to represent two different times in Alec and Jace's love story.Alec and Jace tried to deal with loving each other and not acting on it but there was a breaking point. Jace and Alec plan an escape for months. Years later, they have a family, a business and a life they'll do anything to protect. When the Clave stumbles upon their hideaway, Alec and Jace react.Or; Jace wants to live a life away from the Clave. Alec wants to fight for what they built.





	Whither Thou Goest

**Author's Note:**

> Good day! This fic has an intertwined narrative from two different times over the course of Jalec's life. One part is told from Jace's perspective and is the story of him and Alec running away from the Clave. The sections from Alec's point of view are about the life they build ten years out and when it is interrupted. Apologies if it is confusing. 
> 
> Unbeta'd unfortunately. Still decently new to the fandom and I never read the books so apologies for any misinterpretations of how magic/shadowhunters/runes work. Also just added in a bunch of normal swear words becasue I felt weird doing the angel based swear words without really understanding their usage. I did my best. Also don't own anything Shadowhunters related.

Alec puts another log on the block and swings the hammer down onto the wedge. The log splits in two and he throws the pieces on the pile for winter. They‘ve learned over the years how to keep the fire going steady for the frequent power outages they get on their small island.

He hears the familiar purr of the family boat pulling up to the small dock and smiles. The girls only started public school this year as second graders. Alec misses them throughout the day. During past falls and winters, he’d curl up with them and a blanket by the fire and teach them their ABC’s while storms raged outside.

As expected, it’s Bell who runs up the path first, “Daddy!”

He throws the hammer to the side and kneels to wrap her up in his arms. He places kisses against her cheek and ends with a raspberry that makes her giggle, “How was school?”

“So fun!” she holds on tight to him as he moves her to one arm, “We learned about rocks.”

“Ooh, what kind of rocks?” 

“Ignacious, sedimentry-” she continues to list the other types of rocks as Jace and Claire come into the clearing. It’s a short walk through dense woodlands to get to their cabin in the center of the island they bought years ago, but the trail winds so visitors can’t see their home through the trees. 

“Daddy!” Claire waves the hand that’s not interlaced with Jace’s at Alec. Alec continues to nod along with Bell’s story as he walks closer. He steals Claire away from Jace with his free hand and hikes her up his hip next to Bell. They’re getting big and he doesn’t know if they’ll fit on his hips by their seventh birthday. As exciting as them growing up is, he misses his little baby girls. 

He plants a kiss on Claire’s cheek too, “Hey Sweetie.”

“You need to shave Daddy,” Claire says and both she and Bell giggle as they pull at the scraggly strands of hair. 

“Tell that to your Pops, he likes my beard,” Alec smiles at Jace, a few feet away, arms crossed against the chill. 

“I do like that beard,” he smirks. Alec feels a buzz at his parabatai rune and hums. Being apart for even a short period of time can start an ache in the rune. They’ve gotten it down to a pretty good science but his body loses some tension having Jace next to him again.

“I don’t know, two to one, right girls? Sounds like you win,” Alec teases Jace and the girls laugh. Alec almost doesn’t hear the bell ring over Claire’s whisper in his ear. 

Their reaction is immediate. Jace has a stele out of his back pocket and Alec is running to their porch. He sets the girls down on the first step and kneels to their level.

“I need you guys to go to your room and lock the door the way Pops and I showed you, ok? Can you do that?” 

They must sense the desperation in his voice because they both nod and turn to the sliding glass door. 

“Jace,” Alec calls and Jace throws the stele his way. Jace’s ear is cocked to the east so Alec activates his hearing rune and turns his head the same way. 

The three bells, one outside on the porch, one in their living room, and the other in their bedroom, were set up with magic to ring when someone uninvited sets foot on the small island. Their first summer, the bell had gone off almost hourly. Alec and Jace’s nerves were absolutely fried, taking each ring as a legitimate threat. After posting private property signs along the perimeter, the bell has only rang three times. 

All he can hear is rustling in the woods. They’re both between the sounds and the house. Jace pulls a seraph blade from his hip and Alec keeps his feet light as he pulls his worn bow from under the porch. Alec notches an arrow and points towards the two sets of footprints tramping through their woods. 

The first voice doesn’t mean anything to Alec, “It’s such a small magic signature on the map, it’s probably just an old warlock looking for peace and quiet.” Jace’s posture loosens.

It’s the second voice that makes Alec falter, “That’s the best case scenario. When are our lives ever best case scenarios?”

Jace looks at him, “It can’t be.” That’s when the girls break through the treeline. 

Izzy’s hair is tied back in a braid. Alec takes stock of her weapons out of habit and sees her whip peeking out of the black jacket she’s wearing. Clary has no weapon drawn but she carries herself in a way that makes Alec think she could have one in a moment’s notice. Her eyes widen when she sees them; Izzy’s harden. 

“Jace? Alec?” Clary is already running towards Jace, “Oh my god!” She throws herself at Jace, “Oh my god, we thought you were dead!”

“Clary,” Alec commands, bow turning to aim at Clary, “step away” 

“Alec,” Jace places a gentle hand around her shoulders, “it’s ok.”

“What? Alec?” Clary takes a step back, looks between the three of them, “What is going on?”

He addresses Izzy, swinging the bow back in her direction, “How did you find us?”

Izzy answers, voice sterile, “We weren’t looking for you.”

“I don’t care what you were looking for,” Alec insists, “I asked how you found us.” Izzy keeps her lips in a straight line. 

“Daddy? Pops? What’s happening?” Terror slides down Alec’s spine when he hears Claire’s voice behind him.

Alec’s heart beats faster. His eyes flick between Izzy and Clary for their reactions. Izzy stays calm, eyes focusing in on what can only be twin sets of curls watching the scene unfold. Clary gasps, covers her mouth and looks at Jace, then Alec, finally understanding what she’s stumbled upon. 

“What did I say about going to your room girls?” Alec barks, harsher than he would ever use with his children. 

“Alec,” Alec looks at Jace, frowning and stepping closer and whispering, “calm down.” Alec can’t see but hears Jace pulling the girls in and running fingers through their hair, “Don’t cry, Daddy didn’t mean to upset you. He is disappointed you didn’t follow his directions because it’s very important but he’s not mad at you.”

Alec keeps his back straight, eyes following Clary and Izzy, never letting the bow drop, “Jace,” Alec begs, “get them to their room.”

“They won’t hurt the girls Alec, relax.”

“We don’t know that,” Alec mutters.

“Christ, Alec, they’re our family too. Drop the bow before you scare the girls even more,” that forces the bow out of his hands and the arrow is dropped to the ground. He turns his back on Izzy and Clary, still frozen near the line of the clearing, and takes a seat on the step next to his family. 

“I’m sorry,” he puts his arm behind Jace’s back cocooning their girls in between them. Claire slides onto his thigh and Bell wraps her little arms into his sweater. 

“Who are they?” Claire asks, almost putting her thumb in her mouth but Alec holds her hand in his instead.

Jace answers, “That is your Aunt Isabelle and your Aunt Clary.”

“Isabelle is my name!” Bell jumps gently next to Alec but Jace keeps her next to him. 

Clary pulls a phone out of her pocket, “we have to call Maryse, she won’t believe-”

Jace stands, commanding “No, no calls.”

“Yes calls,” Izzy’s voice doesn’t sound like her in Alec’s ears, “We’re bringing you back to the Institute.”

“No you’re not,” Alec insists.

“You don’t have a say in this Alec. You and Jace have broken Clave laws-”

“Girls,” Alec cuts Izzy off, “This time I really need you to run to your room and stay there, ok? Please?” They run away again but this time Alec knows they’ll be safely out of sight in just a moment, “Don’t make me do this Iz.”

Jace has Clary pinned beneath him in the time it takes him to run across the clearing.  Izzy’s eye never leave Alec’s as she unfurls her whip, “Alec Lightwood and Jace Herondale, by order of the Clave-” she doesn’t finish the sentence before Alec makes his move. 

******

Jace can’t remember when it happened, only the second he had to put a name to the feeling. 

“Alec!” All Jace can see is Alec backed into a wall with three demons pushing him. Jace tries to run but demons block his path. 

It was supposed to be a simple patrol, something they hadn’t done in months. Alec hadn’t been able to get away half as much as before becoming head of the Institute. It was a simple patrol, to blow off some steam. Jace had done the route a dozen times in the past year and there had never been any sign of a nest. 

Fire pushes through his veins and he fights. He takes the demons down, one by one, until he’s pushing his blade into the back of the one hovering over Alec. Alec is on the ground now, skin pale and eyes hazy. Jace quickly draws an iratze.

“Alec, Alec,” Jace repeats, “Talk to me.” Alec doesn’t, stares off into space before taking in a heavy breath. As he exhales, Jace breathes again too, “Alec?”

“Jace,” Alec coughs, “thanks.”

Jace dives forward, collecting him in his arms, “Thank God.”

“I guess I’m getting rusty,” Alec admits. His hold on Jace’s back is loose but Jace won’t let him go, not yet, “Jace, you ok?”

Jace slides his hands up to Alec’s neck, turns Alec’s face to look him in the eye and keeps him close, “That can’t happen again.” His voice cracks, betraying something he never wanted to see the light of day, “Ever.”

Alec’s jaw drops at the intimacy of the position, “Ok.”

“I can’t do that again,” Jace shakes his head, his nose practically brushing Alec’s, “I can’t. You were down and I-”

“Jace,” Alec rests a hand on Jace’s forearm, “Hey, breathe.”

Jace takes in a few heavy breaths and realizes where he is, who it is, and he rips himself away. He puts three strides between him and Alec, still sitting on the ground of the alleyway, “Sorry. About that. You good?”

Alec stands. Jace can’t read his face or the emotions through the bond. Alec’s eyebrows furrow and he tilts his head, “What was that-”

“Don’t ask a question you don’t want an answer to Alec.”

“I want an answer,” Alec encroaches on Jace’s bubble, “I’ve always wanted an answer and never really got one.”

“We’re not talking about this,” Jace shakes his head.

The plains of Alec’s face lose all of their tension, “you love me?”

Jace is suddenly furious, “Of course I love you. That’s not the issue here. The issue is that I-” Alec reaches out and Jace steps back, “-we have to live with a decision I made as a child.”

Alec swallows, loud in Jace’s ear yet he’s so far away. Alec moves his hand from his side to cover his parabatai rune, “I wouldn’t give this up. No matter what you might have offered instead, your soul will always be the best part of me.”

Jace clenches his jaw, balls his hands into fists. He’s right, the steady thrum of Alec’s heart beat in his body is a peace he has always depended on. 

“Good, because this is what we have,” Jace finally allows himself closer to Alec, “this is what we’ve got.”

Alec uses a hand on Jace’s neck to pull him in for a hug, “It’s enough.”

*****

“Here,” Alec drapes a pair of sweatpants and an old T shirt over Jace’s shoulder, “Make sure you get all of her weapons.”

Jace grins, “Not my first time dealing with hostages.” Izzy and Clary, their wrists gripped in each of Jace’s hands so they can’t move, both snort.

“This is so unnecessary,” Clary rolls her eyes.

“Maybe, but I’m not taking any risks,” Alec takes Izzy from Jace and head towards the bathroom while Jace takes Clary to their bedroom. 

Alec locks the door and blocks it from Izzy. He holds out one of Jace’s old sweatshirts and a pair of athletic shorts that he outgrew, “Here. Give me all of your clothes.”

“What the hell Alec?” Izzy crosses her arms over her chest, “You don’t trust me so you have to watch me change?”

“Yeah Iz, that’s exactly it. I want everything, including the blades I know you keep in the wiring of your bras.”

“This is ridiculous,” she says but she starts pulling weapons from their hiding places and takes off her dress. 

Alec grabs a plastic bag from under the sink and starts putting Izzy’s possessions in it. He hesitates before taking her stele too, “Do you need to deactivate any runes?”

“No,” she grumbles and tugs on the sweatshirt. 

When Alec is confident he has everything, he unlocks the door, “Jace and Clary are in the living room, you can go sit with them.” He leaves the door open behind him and takes the plastic bag to their bedroom. Jace left Clary’s clothes in a pile on their dresser. Alec removes the carpet square that covers their floor safe. Inside, there’s multiple passports in their names and varying birth certificates for the girls plus enough cash to sustain them awhile should they need to run. Alec tucks Clary and Izzy’s clothes and weapons in between their back-up plans. Alec runs a hand through the papers and hopes he doesn’t have to pull them out soon. 

Alec closes the safe with a satisfying thud and a weary sigh. His next stop is the girls’ room. 

“Girls?” he knocks gently, “Can I come in?”

Bell opens the door, immediately hugging his leg, “I’m sorry Daddy.”

“Hey now,” he scoops her up and closes the door behind him, “I accept your apology. And I’m sorry too Honey. I didn’t mean to yell like that.”

“I accept your apology too,” she still hangs on to his neck when he sits on Claire’s bed, where Claire is drawing. He holds open his other arm and she settles underneath it. 

“Daddy, what’s happening?” Claire asks.

Alec sighs and tips his head so it rests on top of her’s, “Your aunts are visiting but we weren’t expecting them. Pops and I are being very careful because we want to protect you.”

“Can we meet them?” Claire asks. 

“Yeah, Daddy, please? I want to meet our aunts!” Bell agrees. 

“You can meet them at dinner. Until then, keep playing in here please.” He presses a kiss to each of their foreheads before standing up, “I’ll come get you in a little bit, ok?”

Both girls chirp, “ok,” back. Alec forces himself to walk away and close the door behind him. He presses his forehead to their door once it’s closed and breathes. He grits his teeth and wonders how far he would truly go to keep this small piece of happiness he and Jace built. 

“-so this is the first year we have them in the public schools.” Alec hears Jace’s voice drifting down the hall. Through their bond, Alec knows Jace is at peace, even joyful. Alec sets a neutral face and walks into the fray. 

Jace sits in the middle of the couch, Clary next to him. He has a hand over the back of the couch, not touching her, and Alec is pleasantly surprised that he no longer feels jealous watching the two of them interact. Izzy is curled up in one of the armchairs across from them, chin propped on her knees and listening intently. 

“So far it’s worked out- hey,” Jace smiles as Alec sits behind him. Jace shifts back so they’re hips brush and his shoulder fits under Alec’s arm, “but we’re worried about the winter and the lake freezing and temperatures not getting low enough for us to walk across.”

“What did you do with our clothes?” Clary asks around Jace.

“Hid them,” Alec’s hand runs along Jace’s bicep, “you’ll get everything back when you leave.”

“And how long do you plan to keep us?” Izzy interrupts.

“As long as it takes to convince you not to report us to the Clave,” Alec bites. Jace rests a hand on Alec’s thigh. 

“Can’t we all relax a minute?” Jace grins, “Everyone’s back together, we should enjoy that.”

“We could have been together this whole time if you hadn’t left,” Izzy insists. Before Alec can fire back, Clary butts in. 

“So, what do you do for a living? Can’t be that many demons to kill in the Adirondacks.”

“We own one of the bars in town,” Jace offers, “Nothing glamorous. We’re only open memorial day to labor day so we get eight months a year off.”

“Does that make any money?” Clary asks. She and Jace ignore the way Izzy and Alec are watching each other as they push forward.

“Alec?” Jace pats his thigh and then turns to Clary, “I honestly don’t know. Alec actually runs the place, I just work the bar.”

“We get by,” Alec relents, “there’s only three bars in town and everyone is an alcoholic up here. It helps that we do the majority of the work ourselves so labor isn’t a huge expense.”

“During the summers we have it set up so only one of us ever works at once and someone is always with the girls,” Jace rubs Alec’s thigh, “We hardly see each other all summer, but it works for us.”

“I can’t believe it. Out of all the things I was expecting, bar owners was not one of them,” Clary admits. 

“We’ve been doing it so long, don’t know else we’d do at this point,” Jace admits, “I’ll go get dinner together, any new dietary restrictions I should know about?” Both Clary and Izzy shake their heads so Jace puts his full attention on Alec, “Girls ok?”

“They’re fine, really want to meet their aunts but I told them to stay in their room until dinner.”

Jace nods his head, “I’ll go sit with them before I start cooking.” His hand on Alec’s thigh grips once more before using Alec’s knee as leverage to push himself up, “Get along you three.” Alec follows him with his eyes as he heads toward the back of the house. 

“Wow,” Clary pulls Alec from his thoughts, “You both are actually in love.”

Alec snorts, “We wouldn’t have forsaken our entire lives if we weren’t.”

“No, I mean, he’s cooking dinner,” Clary holds her hands up and motions at the sparse but comfortable furnishings in the living room, “in this house you’ve built together with your twin daughters in the next room. It’s just-” she shakes her head, “I never would have pictured this life for either of you, especially Jace.”

“What are you trying to say Clary?” Alec sits up ready to defend himself. 

“For one,” Izzy decides to participate, “parabatai bonds are supposed to warp when eros is involved so that’s a surprise and two,” she flips her hair back, “what happened to Alec, destined to be the strong leader of the institute and his parabatai Jace, a shadowhunter of legendary abilities? Those people certainly wouldn’t be managing a bar in the middle of nowhere and hiding.” She sits back, arms crossed. Alec grits his teeth. 

“It’s not like we didn’t try. We did. And as for the parabatai bond, the Clave lied,” Alec runs his hand over the rune on his side.

“Ok, woah, stop,” Clary puts her hands up and slides over on the couch, putting herself more fully between Izzy and Alec, “What I actually meant was that I have been in a relationship with Jace, and this is not the guy who I knew. You both must really love each other for this to be what makes you happy.” Clary sets her hands down and shoots Izzy a warning glare, “that’s all I meant, that you seem very happy and I’m glad you have this.”

Alec says a gruff, “thank you,” as Izzy’s jaw drops. Clary purses her lips at Izzy in an attempt to stop her and Izzy must listen because she shuts her mouth. 

After a few moments of unbearable silence, Alec sighs, “So, what’s new at the Institute?”

*****

The halls are dark and still this late at night. He would only ever risk this when the halls are empty. 

There have been too many sleepless nights when he’s made this trek. Alec’s room is only down a hall and a turned corner away from his own, separated from the rest of them due to his status as their leader. Alec leaves his door unlocked for Jace, Jace always locks it behind him. 

It’s been over four years of a charade. They’ve never given into their baser desires but that doesn't’ stop Jace seeking out the emotional support and comfort he finds in Alec. If they really wanted to be safe, he wouldn’t, but all that truly matters is that they can’t take Alec away from him. What they have isn’t eros, no matter how much Jace longs for it. It’s something much more. 

Jace turns the handle and darts into Alec’s room. Alec shifts onto his back, the lights from the city through the window gently illuminating his face. Alec runs a hand over his face and moves right so Jace has room to settle on his left. The lock clicks on the door and Jace takes his spot next to Alec, sitting on the edge of the bed.

Jace absorbs Alec. The sound of his sleepy breath, the curve of his jaw, the lines the sheets make against his bare chest. Jace wants desperately to bury himself there. 

“I can't do this anymore,” Jace whispers into the night. Alec furrows his eyebrows but doesn’t say anything, let's Jace take his time. Jace puts cautious fingers on Alec’s wrist, “I need you Alec.”

“We’ve talked about this-”

“I want to run,” Jace admits. It’s rattled around in his head for years but it's now that he’s desperate enough to say the words, “I want to be together far away from here. I want- Alec, God, I want the chance to live beside you before I die beside you.” Jace’s fingers draw the parabatai symbol on unmarked skin. He looks at the veins in Alec’s wrist rather than at his face. 

Alec sits up, hip right next to Jace’s, breathing the same air, “Jace? Look at me.” Jace does, nose practically bumping Alec’s in the low light, eyes meeting. Jace knows his face is stricken with fear, or guilt, shame, but Alec is full of hope, “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Alec rests his forehead against Jace’s, “Ok. Then we’re doing it.”

*****

They have a charcoal grill they don’t get to use as often as they like with their work schedules. Alec steps onto the back porch as Jace lights the chimneys. 

“Grilling tonight?” 

“Yeah,” Jace prushes his hands off on his pants. “We had the stuff to do it and we won’t get many more chances. You left them alone?”

“Iz won’t leave without her stele or phone,” Alec sits heavy into one of their patio chairs, “and Clary won’t let her ransack our house looking for it.”

“Good of her,” Alec watches Jace at work, “You’re really worried about this, aren’t you?”

“Of course I am,” Alec runs his hands through his hair, “I can’t-” he chokes on the words and stops himself before he shows his hand.

“Babe? Hey,” Jace drops the grate and kneels in front of Alec, “it’s ok. It’s Izzy, she wouldn’t really arrest us and take us back.”

“You heard her earlier,” Alec runs a thumb over his lip, a nervous tick, “she didn’t sound like she was joking.”

“She was probably just shocked. That’s another thing Clary wouldn’t let her do,” Jace takes both of Alec’s hands in his, kisses each palm once, “Relax a bit, enjoy their company. You miss them just as much as I do.”

“I miss my sister,” Alec says, “Not an agent of the Clave who would even think about taking us in and away from our children.”

“Breathe babe. They won’t do it,” Jace grimaces, “And if she does try, which she won’t, I won’t hesitate to fight by your side to keep them safe.”

“Whether she brings us in or not, do you think we’ll have to move?” Alec asks, pulling Jace up from the porch and onto his lap, “I don’t want to move now that the girls are just starting school and making friends.”

“We have to stay here,” Jace tucks his head into Alec’s neck, a position they both find comfort in, “I love this house.”

“I knew you'd get attached,” Alec smiles into Jace’s hair. Being by Jace’s side as they got to provide a normal, mundane life for their daughters is a pleasure amplified by Jace’s devotion to it. Alec never really thought of either of them as domestic until they filled the molds so easily. 

“Can you imagine if it hadn’t been Clary and Iz?” Jace whispers, “It feels lucky. It could have been either of them with someone else or two shadowhunters we didn’t know. What would we have done then?”

Alec doesn’t answer. He knows it wouldn’t have been pretty. Best case scenario, they could have disarmed the guards long enough to grab their emergency stash and head out. Worst case scenario- Alec won’t even entertain the thought.

Jace’s thumb traces Alec’s collarbone under his sweatshirt, Alec holds Jace’s wrist against his chest. They need moments like these throughout the day. Alec doesn’t know if it’s the perversion of the parabatai bond, or just two adults in a loving relationship who crave physical touch to ground them. Jace is convinced it’s an emotional tie more than an actual effect on their bond. All Alec knows is that during the summer, every day, without fail, he feels lighter when Jace comes in. Whether Alec is sitting in his office and Jace walks in and rubs his shoulders or if Alec’s at the bar and Jace clasps their hands before he starts his shift, Alec needs Jace’s warmth against his skin. He craves it. 

The screen door opens, “Uh, hi?” Alec keeps his eyes closed and lets Jace handle it. 

“What’s up Clary?” 

“Just wondering what you two were doing. First rule of a hostage situation is never to leave the hostages alone.”

“Alec is the one who is treating it like a hostage situation,” Jace explains, “I am treating you both like valued guests.”

“I resent that,” Alec quips and Jace kisses the corner of Alec’s lips lightly before getting up from his lap. 

“You need anything, valued guest?” Jace jokes with Clary. Alec opens his eyes to see her wiping a lone tear from the corner of her eye. Looks like she never grew out of the crying thing. 

“Nope,” Clary shakes her head, “I am all set. Hungry, but it looks like you’re taking care of that.”

“Shit,” Jace turns to the grill, “Alec distracted me. I’ll start cooking right now, everything should be done in just a bit. We’ve got beer in the fridge and,” Jace scrambles to get the coals spread evenly, “Alec, do we still have that bottle of merlot we’ve been saving? This would be a good opportunity to open it.”

“Yeah, I’ll go get it.”

“No need,” Clary crosses her arms over her chest, “Izzy won’t drink and I’m fine without. Thanks for the offer though.”

“Since when does Izzy not drink?” Alec huffs. 

“A few years now.”

“Why?”

“Not really my place to say,” Clary takes a seat in the chair next to Alec, “Personal reasons.”

Alec shuts down, turns his face away from her. 

“I didn’t mean it like that Alec. I just meant,” Clary sighs, “It’s just not my place to say.”

“Of course,” Alec’s voice is small, “I understand.”

“Clary?” Jace interrupts, “Can you help Alec set the table out here? It’ll be a lot to carry with the extra place settings.”

“Sure!” Clary jumps at the chance to be helpful, “I’ll be in your kitchen.” She turns and heads back in the house, nervous energy following after her.

Alec scoops himself out of the chair, pauses next to the grill. He waits until Jace meets his eyes, “Thank you.”

Jace smirks and steals another kiss before going back to the grill. It’s the small moments, like this, where Alec feels the deep churning love for Jace in his gut. He pats Jace’s shoulder and follows Clary inside.

*****

Two weeks of hushed planning later, they realize they’re going to need help. 

“We can’t do this alone Jace,” they’re glamoured in a cafe in Brooklyn. They’d come in right before closing and sat in the corner until all the mundanes had left before pulling out their notes. Finding places with no cameras had become increasingly difficult. 

“Who can we trust? Who won’t convince us to stop?” Jace holds Alec’s forearm, a luxury he takes advantage of in their alone time, “All of the people we trust won’t allow this.”

“Izzy,” Alec suggests.

“We can’t bring her into this and you know that,” Jace points out, “if anyone ever found out, she would defend us and keep her mouth shut all the way through the deruning ceremony.”

“There’s no one else in the Institute we can ask then,” Alec purses his lips, “What we really need help with is someone to get IDs and the getaway car for us.”

“A downworlder then,” Jace suggests, “Luke?”

“No, there’s no way he’d approve,” Alec purses his lips, “I know who we need to ask.”

“Who?”

“You’re not going to like it,” Alec interlaces his and Jace’s fingers. 

Jace tilts his head and gets it, “Magnus? Do you really think we can trust Magnus.”

“Of course we can, he’s had our back multiple times Jace-”

“He’s your ex boyfriend Alec,” Jace insists, “six years is 10 minutes to a warlock. Can we really ask him to do this and trust he won’t tell anyone?”

Alec nods his head, “Yes, we can. There’s no one I would trust more to help with this.”

Jace lets go of Alec’s hand, leans back in the booth and meets Alec’s gaze. He won’t ever say it and Alec will never mention it but Jace is jealous, always has been, of the bits and pieces of Alec Magnus has that Jace never thought he’d get.

“Ok,” Jace relents, “we’ll ask him for help. Do we have anything he wants we could give him for payment?”

“He won’t ask for payment.” 

“That doesn’t reassure me.”

“Jace, we can trust him,” Alec starts pulling the pages toward him, collecting them, “You know it was mutual between us.”

“I said ok Alec,” Jace stands, moves in front of the booth and puts a hand on the nape of Alec’s neck. He runs his fingers through the hairs there, “Anything to make this works.”

Alec closes his eyes, reveling in the touch. 

They walk to Magnus’s apartment. It’s late but not as late as they’d like it to be. There’s not much to say between them that needs to be said. All too soon, they’re buzzing Magnus’s apartment and Alec says “it’s me,” into the intercom and Magnus buzzes them right in. 

Jace keeps out of eyeline from the door as Alec knocks. It opens with a cheery, “Alexander, so nice to see you. I never thought I’d get the pleasure to see you at this hour again. It’s been quite a few months.”

“Months?” Jace stresses from his hiding place.

“Ah, I see, not one of those calls,” Magnus’ smile falls, “Come in, both of you.”

“Alec,” Jace puts a hand on Alec’s arm, stopping him in the hallway, “Have you been seeing Magnus?”

“Can we not do this now? Or here?” Alec looks at the door frame instead of in Jace’s eye. 

Jace steps closer to Alec, “I’m not even sure we need to be here anymore,” Jace hisses.

“We talked about this,” Alec insists, “And you’ve slept with three women since the last time I was here.”

“None of whom were my ex-girlfriend who I was in love with for years,” Jace feels used, sweat dripping down his back. 

“Hey,” Alec grabs onto Jace’s jacket, eyes wide and afraid Jace will run, “I’ve been in love with you for years. Now let me ask my ex-boyfriend to help me give up everything for you, ok?”

Jace blinks at Alec before covering the fist on his jacket with his hand. He relaxes Alec’s grip with his fingers, squeezes once and leads Alec into Magnus’s apartment. Magnus sits on the back of his couch, watching them, cocktail in hand. 

“I didn’t mean to eavesdrop on your lover’s quarrel,” Magnus takes a sip of his drink, “but what exactly are you here for Alexander?” The door shuts behind Alec with a flick of Magnus’ wrist.

“I- we need your help,” Alec admits, stepping fully into the room, “please.”

“With what exactly?” Magnus cocks his head, eyeing the space between them. Jace steps forward and shortens it. 

“We want to run away,” Jace puts his hands in his pockets, “fake our deaths, start a new life, the whole shebang.”

“Let me guess,” Magnus croons, “you’re madly in love with each other and you can’t stand the Clave’s ridiculous rules any longer.” 

Alec and Jace turn to each other. Alec’s lips quirk up, “Yeah.”

Magnus snaps his fingers and the drink disappears, “Wonderful, I love a good dramatic romance. How can I help?”

 

*****

“Bell, did you wash your hands?” Alec asks as he helps Claire take her seat. 

“Yes,” she nods and waits her turns to be helped up. Jace carries over a tray full of burgers and grilled corn. 

“Anyone else need a drink?” Alec asks, surveying the table. It’s been awhile since they’ve had more than four at the table. Ms. Edna from the library will come for dinner once in awhile and Magnus will stay and eat when he visits, but otherwise they hardly use the 5th and 6th chair of their patio set. 

“We’re set,” Clary takes a sip of her water and smiles at Jace, “Look at you manning the grill.”

“Believe it or not, I’m the better cook,” Jace starts putting together plates for the girls, cutting the corn off the cob for them. 

“Sure you are,” Alec grumbles. 

“You really going to argue with that?”

“My lasagne.”

“Of course, you may prepare the individual best dishes, but in general I am the better cook,” Jace sets a hand briefly on Alec’s back as he passes by him. Alec grins.

“You have tattoos like Daddy,” Claire points at the rune on Izzy’s wrist. 

“I do,” Izzy nods, “both your fathers have them.”

“No,” Claire swings her pointed finger to Jace, “Pops has colorful tattoos. Yours are black.”

“Colorful tattoos?” Izzy quirks an eyebrow. 

Alec watch as Jace unbuttons the sleeves on his flannel shirt and rolls up the sleeves. It’d taken over two years, but they eventually mapped out a design that incorporated all of Jace’s runes in the patterns without looking suspicious. 

“It was easier than wearing longsleeves and make-up in the summer like Alec does,” Jace holds out his forearms, jewel tones swirling up his wrists in waves around his runes, “I have to get them touched up every few years, but it’s worth it.”

“And it’s so pretty,” Bell claps her fingers together, “Pops says I can get some too when I’m 18.”

“Or you could not do that and draw pictures instead?” Alec knows it’s a battle he’ll lose, even with over a decade left to go. 

“Do you know what our tattoos mean?” Izzy asks Claire. 

“No, but they’re important,” Claire takes a bite of her burger and chews, Izzy’s question forgotten. 

“This island is so beautiful,” Clary’s body turns out, looking into their yard. The clearing they settled in is small and the woods stretch out. 

“We were lucky, got it for a steal,” Jace explains, “The previous owner died and the daughter was from down state. It was great to finally live on land again.”

“Where did you live before that,” Clary asks.

“House boat,” Alec answers.

“Really,” Izzy raises an eyebrow, unimpressed. 

“Yeah, really,” Alec huffs.

“It was just an extra precaution,” Jace reaches out for Alec’s thigh under the table, soothes him, “we wanted to be sure we were safe. We actually kept that boat for awhile until we finally decided to get two smaller boat to make the trip between here and the dock easier."

Izzy and Alec both eat quietly while Jace and Clary talk. It’s the same atmosphere of dinners with the family back when Izzy and Maryse were at each other’s throats, eyes down and on your plate. 

“Do you know Uncle Magnus?” Claire asks. 

“Uncle Magnus?” Clary repeats, looking at Jace and Alec, eyebrows raised. 

“Shit,” Alec puts his head in his hands. 

“Girls, you know we don’t talk about Uncle Magnus with other people,” Jace’s gaze hardens when he talks to the girls. 

Claire argues, “But you said they are our aunts. Aunts and uncles are married!”

“You told Magnus and not us?” Izzy’s voice is hard and Alec can’t look up. 

“We needed his help,” Jace’s hand moves from Alec’s thigh to his shoulder, “we couldn’t do it alone. He portals here a few times a year to check in.”

“He portals here?” Izzy’s voice is ice, “Magnus visits you multiple times a year and you-” her voice breaks off and Alec hears her getting up from the table. 

Jace’s chair squeaks but Alec stops him, “I’ll go.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah,” Alec reassures Jace as his hand slides down Alec’s arm when he stands.

*****

They meet on a rooftop in Chinatown a week before their escape. It’s been months of planning, perfecting, calculating every alternate ending that could get them caught. Alec has one last meeting with Magnus and then they’re gone on Thursday night. 

“Hey,” Jace sits next to Alec, backed up behind an air conditioning unit and out of sight. 

“Hi,” Alec smiles, offers a chinese food container to Jace, “How was the mission?”

Jace shrugs, “Went as expected. We took out the leader and Raphael and his guys are going to talk to those left. Let them figure out the most effective way to deal with them.”

“Thanks for going with the newbies.”

“Yeah,” Jace bumps his arm, “Of course.”

They enjoy their food and watch the sunset together. They share most of their meals together, but not like this. There’s only so much they can get away with saying at a table of people who know them well.  

“Are you nervous?” Jace asks after he spears the last noodle in his container. 

“About leaving?” Alec leans back and looks at him, “Sure, but I think that’s normal.”

Jace nods. He’s been wanting to bring something up with Alec for weeks now but hasn’t been able to say the words. 

“Do you think we could-” Jace runs a hand through his hair, “spend a night together before we leave?”

Alec shifts next to him, “And by spend a night together you mean-”

“Yes.”

Alec purses his lips, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Why not?” Jace insists. 

“For the reasons we discussed years ago,” Alec tosses his container in a bag and starts listing reasons on his fingers, “Someone could easily find out, we could get sloppy, we have no idea what happens to the parabatai bond-”

“But now we won’t be here,” Jace interrupts, “We can just- we can get a hotel room tonight so no one will hear or walk in, say we were out on a secret mission. If anything happens to the bond, we’re gone in five days. We can cover it up that long.”

“Not necessarily, for all we know our skin will turn blue.”

“We could explain it away with the mission-”

“Or we could wait five more days,” Alec sets a hand on Jace’s knee, “What is this about?”

Jace looks out over the skyline. He likes New York, sure, but he really likes open space, trees, free flowing water and the smell of fresh air. It won’t be too bad for him to leave it. 

“Jace?” Alec pushes. 

Jace sighs, “What if we don’t actually like it?” He sets his hand on top of Alec’s, gently rubbing his thumb over Alec’s, “What if we went through all of this work and we don’t actually have chemistry and it’s all been in our heads?”

“That’s not going to happen-”

“It might,” Jace insists, “You might kiss me and realize I really am just a brother to you.”

Alec puts his fingers on Jace’s jaw, moves Jace’s head to meet his eyes, “I know what I want from you. Do you?”

Alec’s hand keeps his head in place so Jace can only move his gaze back to the skyline.

Alec pulls away, puts his head in his hands, “Dammit Jace. Are you not attracted to me?”

“Alec-”

“You were the one who wanted this,” Alec shakes his head, “I asked you if you were sure and you said yes.”

“I am sure, I do want this and I am attracted to you, but I’ve never slept with a man before. You have to understand my hesitation.”

“In all of these years, you’ve never once slept with a man?” Alec inquires. 

“No,” Jace shrugs, “I couldn’t be that vulnerable with anyone else. I’ve only wanted you that way.”

Alec sighs, leans back against the wall, “We can’t. You know it just as well as I do.”

“Yeah, I do,” Jace runs a hand over his jaw. He has to shave soon.

They don’t talk for a few minutes. Alec closes his eyes and Jace uses the opportunity to trail eyes over him. He craves knowing what Alec’s lips would feel like against the pads of his fingers, Alec’s cheek against his chest, the taste of the skin pulled taut on Alec’s neck. He has a checklist he’ll start working on the next weekend, but until then the only sense he can use is sight.

They have maybe 10 minutes before one of them needs to head back to the Institute. 

“You must have some doubts,” Jace questions, “About leaving the Institute to Lydia, or even how we're’ going to make it out there.”

“Of course I have doubts about those things,” Alec admits, “None about you.”

“You must,” Jace pushes, “We’ve been family for years, you must be nervous about us trying to make something else work. We could not work out Alec, and then you’ll regret all of this.”

“Do you really think that might happen?” 

“No,” Jace answers quickly, “but it’s normal to be worried about the future.”

Alec opens his eyes and Jace’s gaze softens. Alec interlaces his fingers in his laps and looks out over the city, “Before we got the parabatai runes, I used to imagine running away with you. I never, never, thought I would be able to come out, so I thought about running. Whether you came as a friend or something else, you always came with me in my dreams. When we became parabatai, I thought my feelings would go away, I truly did and you have to believe that,” Alec turns his head, only continues when Jace nods, “but they didn’t. For the majority of my life, I have wanted this to some degree, either fiercely, or as a thought in the back of my mind but it’s been a constant since I was 15 Jace. You are-” Alec doesn’t finish. He sits there, eyes locked on Jace, lips parted slightly, brows furrowed. 

Jace exhales slow, raises a hand, cups Alec’s cheek. Alec rests into it and Jace trails his thumb over Alec’s lower lip, still jutted out and waiting for the right words to fall on it. 

“I should go,” Jace mutters, “they’ll wonder where we are soon.”

“Yeah,” Alec nods, breaking out of the trance.

“I love you,” Jace breathes, “and I can’t wait to spend my life with you.”

As a response, Alec turns his head to place half a soft kiss against the curve of Jace’s palm. 

“I’ll see you back at the Institute, ok?” Jace pulls his hand away and grabs their garbage.

“Ok, see you soon,” Alec swallows, a bleak grin taking over his face. 

Jace looks at him once more before running off the side of the building. He feels the bond between them stretch, pulling him back, but he pushes forward. 

******

 

Alec follows Izzy as she makes a path toward the back of their house, “Izzy.”

“You can’t keep us here any longer,” Izzy opens doors, looking for their room. Alec stays close but doesn’t touch her, “We need to get back to the Institute, now.”

“Stay at least until morning,” Alec suggests, following into their master suite as she finally finds it, “The girls would love it.”

She turns, throws her hands in the air, “I don’t care! I don’t care about your children from your illegal love affair with our brother!” she goes back to her search, pulling drawers, looking for her things, “I am going back to the Institute.”

“Izzy-”

“You left me Alec!” she throws Jace’s socks on the ground and breathes heavy, turning to him again, “You left me with Mom and Dad and Max. I sat there and watched them cry for you knowing that you really just wanted to get off with your parabatai-”

“Izzy, I swear we tried, but-”

“No, you know what, fine,” Izzy points a finger into his chest, “Fine, have your little secret romance. You left us, whatever, but how could you not tell me?”

Alec is suddenly exhausted, “I left you a note.”

“You left me,” she stresses each word, “a note. You planned for months with Magnus and all I got was a fucking note?”

“We promised,” Alec reaches out to touch her shoulder but she backs away from him, “we wouldn’t tell anyone. We didn’t want anyone to have to carry that burden or suffer the consequences if we were found out. I put you at risk, I couldn’t bear to think about you mourning us. I had to tell you.”

“You didn’t even give me the option to say good bye, or to help you. You know I would have helped you,” Izzy insists, anger calming, “How could you do that to me? I am your sister, your blood, how could you not-”

“Stop.” Jace closes the door behind him and Izzy does stop. Jace leans back against the door and grimaces at Izzy, “Don’t blame him.”

“Who do I blame then? You?” Izzy crosses her arms over her chest. 

“Yeah, blame me,” Jace looks at Alec now, “It’s entirely my fault but-” Jace purses his lips, looks at Alec, his voice soft against all the guilt, “look at him Iz. How could I not love him?”

Alec’s stomach still flutters at Jace’s voice. He can’t stand the distance between them and holds an arm up for Jace to tuck himself beneath. Jace grins before joining him, slinging an arm around Alec’s waist. Alec runs his hand up Jace’s neck and twines his fingers into the hair there.

Izzy’s voice cracks through the moment, “you stole him.”

“Yeah, and you can’t make me regret that,” Jace grips Alec that little bit harder.

“Jace-” Alec starts but Izzy steps forward. Alec braces for impact but the anger has bled out of Izzy’s face. She stands between them, tucks herself under Alec’s chin and into Jace’s side. 

“I miss you both so much,” Izzy murmurs into the space between them. Alec sighs and wraps his arms around her. Jace covers her other side, cocooning Izzy in between them. 

*****

Jace knocks once before entering Alec’s office. The alert he had set to go off showing minor demon activity at the warehouse will go off in just under 10 minutes. He and Alec have to be standing at the monitor to claim it for themselves. 

“Hey,” Jace says quickly going to Alec’s side and sitting on his desk. Jace has been jittery all day, excitement and nerves colliding in his chest, battling for the top spot. 

“Hey,” Alec looks up briefly, brushes a hand on Jace’s knee, but turns back to the paper in front of him. His handwriting is cramped onto the small sheet of paper. 

“What’s that?” Alec had told Jace all the work that needed to be done he finished yesterday. Today had been going through the motions as Head of the Institute. 

Alec runs a hand through his hair, looks up at Jace with his eyes wide. Jace knows he’s not going to like it, “We have to tell her.”

“No,” Jace shakes his head, “No Alec.”

“Do you know what this is going to do to her?” Alec insists, “We’re the two people she’s closest to in the world Jace.”

“Not anymore, she has Simon now. He’ll help her through it,” Jace pleads, “And if you tell her, she will tell Simon, who will tell Clary, and who knows who Clary would tell. It’s a risk we can’t afford.”

“Please Jace,” Alec puts his hand on Jace’s knee. They have sweeped the office for cameras and listening devices so many times but contact in the Institute still makes Alec nervous. The gesture shows his desperation.

The hold eye contact until Jace breaks, “Let me read it first.”

“Of course,” Alec hands over the letter. 

_ Iz,  _ it reads,  _ I am so sorry for what you are or are about to go through. When you read this, you are either just about to be or have already been informed that Jace and I died on a mission. Know that we are safe. Please, for me, don’t tell anyone, not Simon, Max, no one can know but you. I am so sorry I did not tell you earlier, but I could not risk you being involved with this in case we are eventually found. If we are ever found, you know nothing.  _

_ Please, take control of the investigation and sabotage it. Blame it on the fact that you’re mourning but don’t let them investigate our deaths fully. We did our best but if someone looks hard enough, they will figure it out.  _

_ I am so sorry for the mess we have left you. I love you and will miss you dearly. I hope the life you lead will be endlessly happy and I will think of you daily. You are strong, I am so sorry we have to put that to the test by leaving.  _

_ Please burn this after you’ve read it. _

 

Jace takes the pen and scrawls at the bottom,  _ Alec won’t be the only one missing and loving you from a distance. Make sure Max knows how much we love him too. You’re the best sister I could have asked for.  _

“I hope this doesn’t bite us in the ass,” Jace mutters, signing his name. 

“It won’t.”

“We have to go. Are you ready?”

Alec stands, opens a few of his desk drawers, grabs his wallet, “I think so. Not much to bring with us.”

“Let’s go then,” Alec puts the letter to Izzy in a file folder with other papers.

They march out to the ops center. Izzy, Clary, and Lydia are watching the map and discussing fighting techniques. 

“Izzy,” she looks up at Alec’s voice and smiles. 

“What’s up big bro?” she moves away from the girls and approaches them. 

Jace can see the tension in Alec’s face. Alec keeps his voice low, “I have something I need you to look at. It’s highly confidential and of the utmost importance.”

“Sure,” Izzy nods, “I’ll look at it right now.”

“It can wait,” Jace watches Alec maneuver the situation, “It’s not time sensitive but it is crucial. You’ll need to look at it in private.”

“Ok, I’m not doing anything now. Can I go to your office?”

Alec looks at Jace, eyebrow raised. Jace checks his watch. There are three minutes until the alarm hits. They should be able to get out before Izzy reads the note. Jace nods. 

“Sure,” Alec hands her the file. He takes a breath, puts his hand on Izzy’s shoulder, “I love you.”

Izzy cocks her head, “I love you too? Is something up?”

Alec shakes his head, forces a smile, “No, I just wanted you to know.”  

Izzy grins, “Ok, see you boys later.” She struts away and Jace puts his hands in his pocket so he won’t reach out to Alec. 

*****

 

Alec sits on their bed with his hearing rune activated. He listens in on the girls and makes sure they are breathing heavy with sleep. Jace is showering in their bathroom and Alec can hear the pop of their body wash and the water hitting Jace’s body. 

With his family in place, he listens in on the guest room where Izzy and Clary are spending the night. 

“It’s kind of weird to see them like this,” Alec can hear the rustle of clothes as Clary talks to Izzy, “it’s so mundane, it doesn’t click that Alec and Jace are choosing to live this life.”

“I know. Jace and Alec trained their whole lives to become the people they were when they disappeared. I can’t believe they gave that up to own a bar.”

“They seem really happy though. Sure, it’s been a little tense, but I’ve never seen Alec this relaxed. And Jace is a lot softer. I think it’s great.”

“You think it’s great that they left us to pick up the pieces of their selfish decisions?” Izzy snarks and Alec can hear Clary move in the room to console her. 

“Be honest with yourself Iz, are you mad they left, or that they didn’t ask you to come with them?”

Alec’s heart drops out waiting for the answer. It had never occurred to him to ask Izzy to come with them but it seems like Clary has figured out something Alec hadn’t in the last decade. 

“It would have been nice to have the option,” Izzy admits, “Don’t know if I would have taken them up on it but it would have been nice to at least be let in on the plan. Jace and I never fought over Alec, it was like an unspoken agreement that he was the most important person in both of our lives and we obviously loved each other as well, but we managed needing Alec and loving Alec. When they left, without even telling me first, I felt like Alec finally picked which one of us he loved more.”

Alec swallows while Clary reassures Izzy, “You may not want to hear this, but he does love Jace more. He loves Jace in a way you wouldn’t want him to love you. You can’t really think of him choosing Jace over you when Jace was the only choice for him.”

“I know, I know,” Izzy whispers, “It’s just a lot to take in and I feel like I’m 25 again, sitting in that room and reading that god awful letter and realizing I won’t ever see my favorite people again.”

Alec hears the gentle push and pull of clothing that must be Clary rubbing Izzy’s back, “You don’t actually want to take them back to the Institute, do you?”

The silence is deafening to Alec who had hoped for an immediate no from his sister, “Not as prisoners, no but-” Izzy pauses, “what if we said they were captured, or under a spell or something? They could come back, no one would have to know about them.”

“What?” Clary gasps, “Izzy, you can’t do that. They have a life and a family here.”

“We can bring the girls too, I wouldn’t leave them. We could say they were all being held prisoner or something. And then we could be actual aunts to them Clary, and have Jace and Alec back in our lives.”

“And what happens when they call Alec and Jace their fathers? Or worse, if someone were to catch Alec and Jace together and then they ended up exiled and without their parabatai bond?”

“I don’t know, ok? I’m just trying to think of a way they can come back with us!”

“I don’t think they want to come back. Since we’ve gotten here, they’ve made it very clear they would fight us to keep their life the way it is.”

Alec can’t listen anymore and deactivates the rune. He sets his head in his palms and takes a few shallow breaths. 

The bed dips behind him and Jace wraps his arms around Alec’s middle, leaning his body weight into Alec and resting his head on Alec’s shoulder blade, “Everything ok?”

“No,” Alec rests a hand on top of Jace’s over his stomach, “Izzy wants us to go back to the Institute with her.”

“That’s not happening,” Jace dismisses the idea. 

“What if she doesn’t give us a choice Jace?” 

“She’s our sister Alec,” Jace presses a kiss to the nape of Alec’s neck, “she wouldn’t take this away from us.”

“I won’t let her,” Alec’s voice is fierce, determined as he is, “I won’t lose you, or the girls, or our home.” He takes a deep breath to center himself, “We’ve worked too hard for this.”

“Hey,” Jace pulls Alec back. They rest against their pillows, Alec held tightly between Jace’s thighs and arms. He lets himself relax back into Jace’s warmth, “we won’t let her. We won’t let anyone take this from us, ok? It’s you and me Alec, nothing can stop us.”

Alec runs his fingers gently over Jace’s wrist and forearm, following the lines of muscle there, “I love you.”

“And I love you,” Jace places another kiss to Alec’s neck, “always.” 

Jace’s hands roam over Alec’s body, pulling Alec tighter against him. It’s then Alec realizes Jace is still naked from his shower. 

“Really Jace?” Alec huffs but moves into the attention, “When Izzy could hand us over to the Clave tomorrow?”

“You know she won’t do that, plus,” Jace starts to pull up Alec’s shirt, “doesn’t that make it more exciting?”

Alec chuckles and turns his body to hover over Jace, “When you put it that way.” 

*****

 

“Toss me your phone,” Jace calls and Alec throws it. Alec is building the spot where the fire will start. The chemicals and materials he uses should mimic that of a magic accident when analyzed after the fact. Jace sets up a few of their old clothes, phones, weapons as if they had been lying there when the building burns. They picked this warehouse due to the hundreds of battered tarps and fabric from when it was a black market clothing mill that was shut down. It will go up quickly with the right ammunition. 

“You ready?” Alec asks. 

“Yeah,” Jace jogs across the building to him, “here.” He holds the pack of matches out to Alec. 

Alec takes them, pulls a match out but doesn’t strike it. Jace watches, shifting on his feet. 

“Alec?” 

“I have one doubt.” Alec keeps his eyes on the unlit match.

“What?”

“You asked me a few days ago about being nervous,” Alec breathes, “And you said it’s normal to have doubts.”

“Alec,” Jace sets his hand on Alec’s neck, steps closer, “Now?”

“I just-” Alec bumps his nose against Jace’s and sets their heads together, “What if you regret this?”

“I won’t-”

“You don’t know that,” Alec’s voice cracks, “What if years from now, wherever we end up, you regret giving up everything? You worked so hard-I couldn’t bear it, Jace. Knowing you’d given up your life just for me and I wasn’t enough.”

Alec is trembling with the force of his confession and Jace runs his thumbs over Alec's cheeks in case a tear falls. 

“Alec,” Jace smiles, hoping Alec can feel it, “Light the match.”

Alec swallows, nods his head against Jace’s. They both look down, still close, as Alec strikes the match. He tosses it into the various kindling he’d pulled together and strikes another. He keeps striking matches until the fire starts to crackle. 

Alec throws the rest of the matches into the flames. He gets his hands around Jace’s back and pulls him in for a kiss. 

Jace gasps, finally, with this craving satisfied. He holds on tightly, a hand fisted in Alec’s hair and takes what Alec gives.

They only break apart when the fire starts to roar and gain power. Jace pulls Alec out of the building, running hand in hand. 

******

Alec makes pancakes for breakfast. He’s up first, sliding out from under Jace and showering as the sun rises. He pulls out the pancake mix and assumes the steps in the hall are Claire. 

“Morning,” Izzy perches on their countertop, swinging her barefeet like she’s 16 and asking him if Terry from Idris said anything to him about her. 

“Hey, sleep well?” he asks on autopilot. 

“Yes, you have a very comfortable guest bed,” she admits, “Pancakes?”

“It’s Saturday. Got to start the day off special,” He cracks eggs into the mixing bowl.

“I don’t think I said it yesterday, but I’m happy for you,” Izzy admits and Alec snorts. 

“Definitely didn’t say that yesterday.”

“Alec, come on,” she leans over and rests her hand on his shoulder, “big brother.”

He sighs, sets the whisk down, “yes?”

“It’s definitely weird,” she smirks, “and I don’t think I’ll ever get used to seeing you and Jace- like that, but I’m glad it worked out and you’re happy.”

“Thank you,” Alec covers her hand.

“I get that you don’t want to come back with us, and I won’t force you,” tension physically pushes itself out of Alec’s body with a heavy sigh, “but I want to be able to visit. The girls are going to need women in their lives when their older, family.” She squeezes his shoulder and her voice is chopped, “plus I guess I miss you too.”

“Of course you can visit,” Alec brings her into a tight hug. He kisses the top of her head, “we have to be very careful. Come with Magnus. If that’s not enough, we can figure something else out.”

“That’s a perfect start,” Izzy agrees.

“Why are you hugging?” Claire asks, still in her fox pajamas, standing next to the refrigerator. 

“What, I need a reason to hug people now?!” Alec fakes outrage. He lets go of Izzy and stamps over to his daughter, “I was going to hug you but I don’t have a reason.”

“Yes you do!” Claire jumps up and he catches her in his arms, “It’s morning, it’s a good morning hug.”

“Good morning then,” Alec murmurs as she tucks into his chest. Izzy smiles at them and he reaches back out for her, drawing her into their embrace.

*****

 

They run out of the building as it burns behind them. Magnus is two blocks away, waiting with two backpacks.  

Alec and Jace slow as they approach, hustling into the small park. Magnus hands the black backpack to Alec, “Passport and driver’s license for Alec Smith in that one, plus a few hundred thousand dollars.” Magnus tosses the grey pack and Jace catches it, “ID’s for a Jon Smith as well as credit reports, social security cards, and a marriage certificate.”

“Marriage certificate?” Alec questions. 

“Just in case,” Magnus shrugs, “my trusted confidant has dropped a car for you in upstate New York. The keys are in the front pocket of Jace’s bag, it’s registered to Jon Smith and it can’t be traced back to your current identities. I’ll portal you to the car and then you drive until you feel safe. As soon,” he puts a hand on Alec’s shoulder, “as you are settled, even if it’s years, take pictures of where you’re staying and mail them to me without a return address. Hopefully, that will be enough so that I can portal to you and make sure you’re ok.” 

Alec pulls Magnus in for a tight hug, gripping his shoulders, “Thank you. Thank you so much.” 

Jace watches as Magnus pets Alec’s hair, “Of course Alexander.”

Alec steps back, not looking at Magnus, voice choked when he speaks, “we need to go.”

“Magnus,” Jace touches Magnus’s arm, “Thank you.”

Magnus purses his lips before drawing Jace in as well, “Make him happy?”

“I will, everyday,” Jace promises. He claps Magnus once on the back and steps next to Alec. 

“Here it goes,” Magnus opens the portal, “Good luck boys.”

Jace walks toward the portal. Alec looks back once at Magnus, smiles, before grabbing Jace’s hand and passing through the portal. 

They fall out on the side of the road, the only light coming from street lamps few and far between. A black Ford Taurus sits on the side of the road a few feet away. Jace pulls the keys and hits unlock. The headlights flash. 

“Guess that’s it,” Jace breaks the careful silence. It doesn’t feel real, this moment they’ve been planning. Finally free. 

“Pop the trunk,” Alec asks and Jace does, “our clothes and our money are here.”

“I thought the money was in your backpack?”

Alec blushes, “Magnus told me he wanted to give us a bit of a cushion. Based on the extra suitcase back here, I think he undersold the size of the cushion to me.”

Jace sighs and gets in the driver side door, “That’s very generous and doesn’t worry me at all.”

Alec shakes his head, “You going to drop this jealousy thing any time soon?”

“Maybe.” They unzip the backpacks to organize. In Jace’s pack there are a few changes of clothes for them, his brand new license, and a folder with their important papers. Alec locks as much of the money from his bag in the glove compartment as he can and puts the new credit cards and license in his wallet. Jace explores the folder further. There are old tax returns, letters of recommendation for both of their aliases, and something rattling. 

“Alec,” he holds up a small plastic bag that had been taped on the inside, a silver and a gold band inside.

“Do you remember the conversation where we agreed to be married?” Alec asks, taking the rings from Jace.

“I remember him mentioning that it would be easier for us if we were married,” Jace grins, “And I remember saying we’d think about it and never telling him one way or the other.”

Alec grimaces at the rings, “We have to do it. Our IDs have the same last name and we can’t tell people we’re brothers.”

“And apparently we’ve filed joint tax returns as a married couple for the past two years,” Jace holds up the forms. 

Alec sighs, takes the silver ring and hands the bag back to Jace. Jace looks at the ring. 

“He got the parabatai rune engraved on the inside,” Jace grins but takes in the somber look on Alec’s face as he fiddles with the band, “You ok?”

“We’re never going to have a real wedding now,” Alec whispers, “It wasn’t something I really wanted but-”

“Hey,” Jace touches Alec’s left hand, “would you have wanted a wedding without our family anyways? Without Izzy, Max, Clary, hell, Magnus? I don’t think I would.”

Alec nods, “you’re right.”

Jace holds out both his hands, left hand down and right palm up, his ring sitting on his palm, “Come on, put it on me?”

Alec glances up, eyes wide. His jaw relaxes as he takes the gold ring and slips it onto Jace’s fingers. He offers the silver ring and his left hand to Jace who repeats the motion.

“Kiss me again?” Alec asks, almost shy. Jace reaches up to pull Alec’s face close, enjoying the heat of their proximity. He pulls away unable to swipe the smile from his face. 

“To our honeymoon,” he turns the keys in the ignition and pulls away from the curb. Alec turns the radio dial until he finds something besides static. 

“It’s real happening,” Alec murmurs, “We’re really doing this.”

“Yeah we are,” Jace smirks, “And the Clave can’t do a thing about it.”

“They could figure it out and drag us back to the institute, derune us, banish us to opposite sides of the planet and let us die without being able to protect ourselves against demons,” Alec is grinning but it’s not an impossibility.

“That’s the worst case scenario, and even that has a silver lining,” Jace reassures. 

“What’s that?”

“I wouldn’t have long to live without your soul next to mine,” Jace turns his brights on, not having seen anyone in the few miles they’ve driven.

Alec sets his hand on Jace’s thigh, “That’s awful and cheesy.”

“You better get used to it,” Jace says, “I’m a huge romantic.” Alec snorts and Jace laughs, “I am. Prepare to be swept off your feet baby.”

“Already married you, don’t think sweeping is really necessary.”

“It’s necessary, get ready,” Jace grins and sets a hand over Alec’s on his thigh, “God, this is too easy with you.”

“Touching?” Alec asks. 

“Touching, flirting, kissing,” Jace’s shoulders drop inches with relief, “loving you.”

“Oh god,” Alec groans but turns to hide his blinding smile. Jace keeps driving, one hand on the wheel and the other interlaced with Alec’s hand in his lap.

Two hours of driving later, Alec stirs. “Here,” Alec points to a neon sign off the side of the road, “Let’s stop here.”

“I can drive a few more hours,” Jace insists. 

“Yeah, but if we check in any later, it might be suspicious,” Jace agrees and pulls into the lakeside motel tucked in along the road. 

They shuck off their leather jackets and change into clean shirts Magnus bought them in bright colors. The majority of their all black wardrobe is still back at the Institute. 

“I think I’ll get tattoos,” Jace muses as he tugs a pale green t-shirt over his head. 

“Hmm?” Alec grabs a few hundred dollar bills from the glove compartment stash. 

“I’ll hide the runes in plain sight, get sleeves or something,” Jace holds up his arms, runes obvious against his skin, “instead of using that make up. I’ll get your face as a part of it.” Jace smirks and Alec shakes his head as he gets out of the car.

An older woman sits back in a chair, book in her hands, at the check-in desk, “How can I help you?”

“The sign said you have vacancies?” Alec points over his shoulder with his thumb, “Can we get a room?”

“Just one?” she puts the book down and turns to her computer, “two queen beds?”

“Actually,” Jace leans his elbows on the desk, grins, “Just one king would be best. His toes hang off the edge of queen sized beds.”

“Oh, sure,” she coughs, “we’ve got one open.”

“Perfect, thanks,” Jace raps once on the counter, glances back at Alec while she sets up their booking.

“What brings you boys to the Adirondacks this time of year?” 

Jace can see Alec fidget, nervous, so he jumps in, “Our anniversary was Saturday so we were up in Quebec. This one,” he wraps a hand around Alec’s bicep, “thought he could drive through the night but I didn’t think it would be safe to risk it once he started yawning.”

“That’s good, these roads are winding and there are no lights for miles at some points.”

Jace makes pleasant small talk, “We actually don’t have to be back in the city for a day or two, are there any towns that are worth checking out while we’re up here?”

“Of course,” the woman nods, grabbing two keys, “if you came from the north you must have passed through Webster a few miles back. It’s a lovely town, some nice restaurants and a lot of antique shops.”

“Oh babe, antiques,” Jace turns to Alec and swats his abs, “we absolutely love antiquing. We have to stop tomorrow.” Alec looks dazed, nodding along with Jace but otherwise letting him handle it until the woman gives them their total.

“Just the one night is $125,” she says, handing Alec and Jace the keys. Alec hands over two bills and she gets their change, “I hope you do enjoy the shops. I’m always able to find something.”

“The issue with me is never finding something, it’s finding too many somethings,” Jace smiles once more at the woman, “Thanks so much for all of your help.”

“Of course, have a good night,” she waves at them as they head out the door. 

“What was that all about?” Alec asks as they walk down the sidewalk to their room. 

“People are a lot less suspicious of nice people,” Jace shrugs, “Plus, fun to make up the story.”

“Glad to hear that, because we need to hammer out our back story,” Alec opens the door and flicks on the switch, “want to check out that town tomorrow? See if it will be a good place to settle?”

“Can you imagine us as antiquers?” Jace closes the door behind him and leans up against it. Alec throws his backpack onto a chair and Jace looks at the big bed taking up the center of the room. They’re finally alone, they’re finally free. He swallows, “Alec-”

Alec twists his head over his shoulder to look at Jace. Jace watches as he grits his teeth, scans his eyes over Jace’s body. They move together. 

It almost hurts, Jace clawing, pulling Alec closer and closer. He gets his mouth on Alec’s and it’s hard, their faces jammed together. It’s overwhelming, years of anticipation for one moment. 

Jace puts some space between their faces, keeps his hands close around Alec, “We’ve got time, a lot of it.”

Alec smiles, gets his hands around Jace’s neck and his thumbs running over Jace’s jaw, “Jace,” he presses a soft kiss to Jace’s bottom lip, “get the fuck out of your clothes and get on the bed.”

Jace laughs, spilling into Alec’s smile.

*****

“And you’ll visit?” Bell is holding back tears, cradled in Clary’s arms. 

“Of course we will!” Clary smiles, “When your Uncle Magnus visits, we’ll come with him, ok?” Bell nods her head but wipes both of her eyes with her little fists. Izzy is crouching, talking quietly to an equally dejected Claire. 

“It didn’t hit me until now,” Jace steps up behind Alec, “They really don’t have women role models in their lives.”

“No,” Alec agrees, reaching back to tug Jace close, “Almost a good thing this happened before they hit puberty.”

Jace chuckles, falling into Alec. They wait their turn to say good bye. 

Izzy and Claire come to some sort of agreement and walk hand in hand to Alec and Jace. Clary walks over as well, Bell still on her hip. 

“I will give this back to you,” she hands off Bell to Alec, who puts her on his own hip, and then draws Alec into a tight hug, “I’m so glad you’re alive and happy.”

“Thank you,” he whispers, “And thank you for convincing her to let us stay.”

“She never would have done that to you,” Clary promises, “I just showed her what she already knew.”

Alec squeezes hard once and then lets go. Izzy and Jace are still holding each other, swaying slightly and not saying a word. They take a few moments more before splitting apart. Izzy smiles at Jace before swapping spots with Clary and wrapping her arms around Alec. 

“I love you so much,” he presses his nose into her hair, murmurs right into her ear, “and I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry. I get it now,” Izzy clings, “and I love you too. I’ll see you soon.”

“Yes, I will see you soon.”

She kisses his cheek before stepping away, “Well, we better get going.”

Jace still has Clary under one arm, “You guys know where to go and how to get back?”

“Yeah,” Clary nods, “we’ll be fine. And we’ll be back before you know it.”

“We’re counting on it,” Alec smiles at both of them, wishing they would have put up more of a struggle just so he could have kept them around a little bit longer. 

“Bye boys and girls,” Izzy and Clary take their leave and quickly disappear down the path to the water. 

“Daddy, put me down,” Bell struggles in his grip, “We want to go play in the leaves.”

“Ok, be safe,” He sets her down. Immediately, she and Claire dart to the leaves scattered under a large maple just on the edge of their yard. 

Alec joins Jace, already sitting on the steps of their porch and watching the girls play. Jace extends his arm against the edge of the step to make a backrest for Alec. Alec gladly takes advantage and sits close. 

“It was good to see them,” Alec purses his lips, “I don’t know how we went so long without seeing them.”

“It’s scary,” Jace agrees, “I forgot how much I missed them. That part of our lives seems so hazy now, like a fantasy, that you forget the people were real.”

Alec hums and tilts his head onto Jace’s shoulder. Not only is he glad to see them again, but the thought of their daughters now having family is a relief.

“Hey,” Jace runs a hand up Alec’s side, “Would you want to go back to that life?”

“No.”

“But if we could bring the girls. Say the Clave has changed, parabatai are encouraged to be lovers and start families together. Would you want to be a shadowhunter again?”

Alec thinks, “Would you want to go back?”

“No, I’m asking you. What would you want?” Jace knocks his head against Alec’s, finger dipping under Alec’s sweater at his waist.

“If you wanted to go back, I’d go back. If you didn’t, I wouldn’t push it.”

“That’s not an answer Alec.”

“Fine,” Alec huffs, “Then not really. Sure, shadowhunting was great in our 20s but I like our life. I like having time off, and not worrying about whether we’d make it home alive. I grew a distaste for the politics after a while. Maybe I’m lazy and a dishonor to the Lightwood name, but I’m happy here.” He sets a hand on Jace’s knee, “But, if you missed it, we would go back. As long as I was with you and you were happy, I’m happy.”

“Ok,” Jace says, “I wouldn’t want to go back either.”

“Yeah? Wouldn’t want to resurrect the great and powerful Jace Herondale?”

“No,” Jace kisses Alec’s forehead, “I like this. I’m where I want to be.”

“Good,” Alec settles in closer, molding the curves of his body to those on Jace, “I’m glad you don’t regret this.”

Jace murmurs, turning Alec’s face to meet him, “How could I regret any of this?”

Alec loves Jace’s eyes. They don’t seem possible, icy blue with the splotch of gold. Jace can’t hide anything, between the twitch of his eyebrows and the bat of his lashes, his emotions spill out from all sides. So often, when Jace looks at Alec, Alec can practically hear the  _ I love you _ .

Alec runs a hand through the shaggy cut of Jace’s hair, traces his thumb along Jace’s skin. It almost hurts keeping the words in, “Love you, Parabatai.” Jace squeezes them even closer together as if it were possible to take up the same space. Alec watches the girls play tucked in under Jace’s chin. 

*****

“So,” Jace pulls himself up onto the bridge railing, looking out at the river and trees around them, “What do you think?”

“Could work out,” Alec straddles the railing next to him, “The lady at the library told me they’re hiring.”

“I could see you doing that. I bet the library would get ten times more popular the second you’d show up.”

Alec rolls his eyes, “And we could dock the boat at the marina in town.”

“First we have to buy the boat,” Jace points out, “That might take awhile.”

“It shouldn’t,” Alec adjusts his seat, “There’s a place that sells big boats only a few towns over.”

“Did you get on the internet at the library,” Alec nods in response, “Good idea.”

“Sunset’s beautiful,” Alec turns and looks over the water, “Never looks like this in the city.”

“I’ve got a pretty beautiful view too,” Jace smirks. Alec punches his shoulder without taking his eyes off the sunset, “You hungry?”

“Yeah,” Alec hops down from the rail, shifts close to Jace, “There’s a casual place in town we can go for dinner.”

“Good with me,” Jace stays on the rail. He leans back, some of his weight resting onto Alec, “Thank you.”

“For?”

“Doing this,” Jace mutters, “I know it’s not always going to be easy, but I think it will be worth it.”

Alec wraps his arms around Jace’s waist, tucks his chin over Jace’s shoulder. He whispers, “It will be.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think.
> 
> Tumblr. emmybazy.tumblr.com


End file.
